Heckled By ParrotsBlue Sky WritingFalconryRebecca K. O'Connor

Examining, Surviving and Loving life with Parrots

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Top Five Things Your Parrot SHOULDN’T Say

5. Come In

Many of us have already discovered this the hard way, but when someone knocks on the door, go through the trouble of walking over and opening it. Even if you know who’s there, don’t call out an invitation to open the door. Otherwise you may come out of the shower one afternoon to find a stranger in the livingroom who your parrot was kind enough to invite to “come in.”

4. Oh baby!

Don’t keep the parrot too close to the bedroom. Even if you’ve seemed to have been safe so far, don’t forget that your parrot probably spends time when your gone working on his new repertoire. Your neighbors might be wondering if your filming “movies” in your home. 

3. &%$*  or  @#(^

Or any variation of four letter foulness. Don’t let your teenagers teach your parrot to curse either. Trust me, the novelty wears out, especially if your mother-in-law is a frequent dinner guest.

2. I’m gonna kill you.

Or anything else that might encourage your neighbors to call Child Protective Services. You might find yourself in the same kind of trouble as this woman who tweeted that she was going to smother her child.

1.  I love you (insert illicit lovers name here)

If you’re going to have an affair, don’t have it near the parrot. It’s best not to cheat on your spouse in general, but don’t trust your parrot to keep your secrets. If you don’t believe me, ask Suzy about keeping Gary on the side.

11 Comments

  1. FromChristina says:

    It’s one thing to be careful about what YOU say around the bird and another thing entirely to try to control what other people say. My old college roommates and friends thought it would be absolutely hilarious to teach my parrot curse words and other inappropriate things like “homo”.

    Thankfully, the only thing she picked up from them is the dreidel song.

  2. rebecca says:

    LOL — yes, there could be worse things. One of my bird trainer friends tried to teach my grey to say in his voice, “I’m under your bed.” Fortunately that didn’t stick.

    However, the things that do stick, seem to go away when you remove the instigator and if not encouraged.

    So for those of you who already have parrots with potty mouths, there’s still hope to clean up the conversation.

  3. graham says:

    friend of mine has a nice Grey. You ask him to give you a kiss (the parrot – not my friend) and he just stares back at you. as soon as you turn your back he says “Oh, **** you then”

  4. Wendy Weber says:

    You’re right about the words. The pet shop where I board my bird, make that birds, now, shows movies on a big screen. They are “G” rated, of course, just for that reason. Could get quite embarrassing, otherwise. Wendy

  5. CagTagMomma says:

    I adopted a 6 yr old Congo (Zazu) about 5 yrs ago and she had quite a colorful list of words that came out mostly when there was high emotions going on (hubby yelling at football game on tv, loud discussions re: poltics, a slammed door or hammer mishap – stuff like that). After all this time, they still come out; however, it makes us better about lowering our energy & may have averted a tiff at times ;-)
    The first time I found out about the potty mouth was a shock though. The morning after I brought her home, I took a grape over to her. She politely accepted it through the cage door, then looked up at me and said as clear as clear as a bell…. “whore!” When I questioned the former owner about it later she said that was reserved for the Mother-in-law! I didn’t have the chops to ask whose mother? We suspect that since Zazu came from a young couple w/ a small child, there might have been lots of newly wed fights in her former home. Other than the occaisonal bleepers, she’s a doll & bonded to both me & hubby (even though she was daddy’s girl in the other house).

  6. Mary says:

    Our severe macaw, who came to us when he was 19, has quite the colorful vocabulary. Since we don’t reinforce it, or say the words ourselves, it’s mostly gone away, but something pops out every once in a while.

    His favorite is calling me into the room by my name and when I enter the room, he says “F*** you! I hate you!” (this hasn’t happened for at least 6 months now).

    Last year when we were on vacation, he told out birdsitter to “F*** off” a few times. And he likes her!

  7. rebecca says:

    You guys are killing me. These stories are great. I mean…it’s not funny when a parrot swears…not funny at all…

  8. Anne says:

    I had a grey that my teenage cousin taught to yell “sup bitches” whenever somebody walked in the room. Sad to say it won’t forget it.

  9. Nikki says:

    I have a greenwing macaw and his favorite thing to do when we have visitors in the house is screech “F**k!!!!!” as loud as he can, then laugh to himself.

  10. Eloise says:

    Those are so funny!

  11. Elyse says:

    I have a one year old parakeet that says everything I do!! Crazy how smart something so small can be. My particular budgie has very good pronunciation and emphasises every word to the “t”. Only learning things withing two or so days, I have to be very careful! :)